In the beginning stages of a relationship everything feels fresh and new. As we spend time with our partners, we get to know them. We find that we share many personality traits and values. There will be many ways in which we differ too. These differences may seem cute and interesting at first but over time they can become a source of conflict. What was at first seen as a strong decisive nature is now seen as being controlling. Laid-back-ness becomes laziness and so on.
Conflict arises when we judge these differences. We accuse our partners of being wrong because they have an opinion that differs with something we feel strongly about. Right or wrong are merely a matter of perspective. When we hold back our judgement for a moment and make the effort to try and understand our partner’s point of view, we create space for them. Space in which we allow them to be different. Even if we don’t agree with them, we can love them enough to accept them as they are.
